Aliens Are Secretly Running Wall Street!

A tabloid poem

Photo by Charisse Kenion on Unsplash

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Supermarket tabloids always grab my attention when I’m at the checkout line. Their outlandish headlines always get me thinking about celebrities or topics I’d ignore under normal circumstances.

Tabloid headlines offered inspiration for a specific poem I wrote as a college student.

I minored in creative writing while attending the University of Utah and took some fun creative writing classes during my final year before graduation. In one such class, the professor gave us a list of supermarket tabloid headlines and assigned everyone to craft a short poem based on a headline of our choice. The poem below, detailing a secret conspiracy revealing aliens are running Wall Street, is the result of that long ago assignment. I dug this poem out of an old notebook, polished it like a freshly picked apple, and decided to share it with you all.

Enjoy!

Photo by Jonathan Martin Pisfil on Unsplash

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Their armies did not swarm
over our land like locusts
with massive spaceships 
and high-tech death rays. 

They wore suits and ties
and carried briefcases.
Currency inside each one
as green as their true skin. 

Their disguises are perfect 
down to the smallest detail.
No one passing in the streets 
will ever guess their identity. 

Every day, they tinker
with our naive minds.
Going up and down. 
Recession and boom. 

The market is topsy-turvy.
We are permanent slaves
shackled and chained
to the almighty dollar. 

You poor pitiful fools.
Why did you believe
greedy soulless CEOs 
were the real criminals? 

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Is there a specific tabloid headline you would like to see turned into a future poem? Comment below.